Does Your Spouse Pay For Your Past?

We have seen the scenario time after time. Two people come together in marriage with some type of baggage from past relationships. Be it from an ex spouse, a parent, siblings, or a bad teacher, many people have some old wombs from the past that is brought into their marriage. And it has been rightly said many times, “you shouldn’t make your spouse pay for what someone else did.”

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But recently when a couple in our marriage class was talking about some stuff they have to deal with from their past and how their past experiences cause them to react the way they do today, a new idea on this issue struck me.

A Win Win Proposition

Have you been in that place where you feel if you keep giving your all to your marriage, you might end up wishing you hadn’t? Maybe, you thought, “this could help my marriage, but then again what if it doesn’t?” After all, you don’t want to give your all to a relationship that could hurt you. What if it doesn’t work out? You feel you have to hold back, just in case. If you did everything you could to really love your spouse and invest in your marriage and then turn around and still end up losing your marriage, wouldn’t you look like a fool?

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Or maybe you find yourself in a battle with your spouse and your afraid of what might happen if you don’t win the argument or get your way in the situation. You don’t want to come across as the weak one in the relationship, so you take your stand and you remain strong through everything. Don’t let them see you cry. Don’t ever let your spouse think they got the best of you, right?