“They Didn’t Even Smell of Smoke!”

SmokeDaniel 3:27 (NLT) “Then the high officers, officials, governors, and advisers crowded around them and saw that the fire had not touched them. Not a hair on their heads was singed, and their clothing was not scorched. They didn’t even smell of smoke!”

One thing we encounter a lot when helping couples get through their marriage troubles is the feeling of despair. Very often we will hear a husband, a wife, or both express to us that they just don’t see how they can ever get past what has happened to their marriage. There may have been affairs, abuse, or some other type of betrayal that has cut them to their very core and it has made it nearly impossible for them to believe that their marriage could ever be whole again. And even though they are attempting to save their marriage they are also wrestling with the agonizing question of, “will I have to live with this pain for the rest of my life?”

Just Say No To Naysayers

“Will anyone support my decision to try to save my marriage?” This was the thought that ran through my head time after time as family and friends continued to discourage the position I took to save my marriage. I was believing for a miracle turnaround, but most of my loved ones thought I was a fool. The naysayers almost got the best of me.

no to naysayers

I understood the naysayers were only concerned about my well-being. They did not want to see me hurt more than I already was. And the truth is if I had wanted to end my marriage I would have appreciated their support for that.

Love Is The Cure For Envy

1004641_987540161 Corinthians 13:4 (NET) “Love is patient, love is kind, it is not envious. Love does not brag, it is not puffed up.”

1 Corinthians 13:4 (NASB) “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,”

Depending on which translation of the bible you prefer you will often see the words jealous and envious interchanged with the other. The reason of course is both words can have similar negative meanings.

Love Redeems

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16

“This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:12-13

Zemanta Related Posts Thumbnail

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 “knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers,19 but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ.” 1 Peter 1:18-19

Is Your Patience Running Thin?

For many years I struggled with loving my wife. I could always say it and most of the time I felt it, but the challenge for me was knowing how to show it in a consistent way that made sense. Even when I thought I was showing love in one way, my other actions would contradict me and cause Janet to question if I really loved her or not.

ID-10060606

One of the problems I had with loving my wife and my children was the way I would lose my patience with them. They just never knew when my patience would run out and I would turn on them in some sort of harsh demanding way. I didn’t want to treat them badly and I had no excuse for it. So I just blamed it on my lack of patience.

A Win Win Proposition

Have you been in that place where you feel if you keep giving your all to your marriage, you might end up wishing you hadn’t? Maybe, you thought, “this could help my marriage, but then again what if it doesn’t?” After all, you don’t want to give your all to a relationship that could hurt you. What if it doesn’t work out? You feel you have to hold back, just in case. If you did everything you could to really love your spouse and invest in your marriage and then turn around and still end up losing your marriage, wouldn’t you look like a fool?

ID-10069370

Or maybe you find yourself in a battle with your spouse and your afraid of what might happen if you don’t win the argument or get your way in the situation. You don’t want to come across as the weak one in the relationship, so you take your stand and you remain strong through everything. Don’t let them see you cry. Don’t ever let your spouse think they got the best of you, right?

Love Is More Than A Feeling, It’s Also A Choice

On a previous post, I Want To Know What Love Is, I talked about love as a feeling and how difficult it is to describe that feeling. In that post, I said, “not one time does the Bible refer to love as being something you feel.”

But after saying that and reading in the word this week I had to go back and edited that line. It now reads, “Not one time does the Bible refer to love as something you only feel.” The important change I made was adding only.

say yes to feeling love

I had to make that change because to be honest love has to also be a feeling. It is that thing inside causing us to say, “I love you and I want to marry you.”

And when we do something that shows our love we explain, “I did it because I love you.”

I Want To Know What Love Is

When I was a teenager I began to question, what is love? It seemed like a mystery to me. I remember thinking that love was something you could feel but there was no good way to define exactly what it was. I believed I knew from experience what love was, but I had no idea of how to explain it to anyone.

love is

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I suppose a lot of people have felt that way. Why else would people say “I think I’m in love.” Or on the other side of that, “I don’t think I love him/her anymore.” It sounds like it has always been a mystery when you hear so many different versions of, “well I like him/her, but I don’t know if I’m in love with him/her.” And then there is that thing people say when trying to explain how they feel by saying, “I do love him/her but I don’t think I’m IN LOVE with him/her, you know what I mean.” No, I can’t say I know what they mean when I hear that.

Learning To Accept Your Spouse

Our spouses are unique in their own way. Individuals who have their own taste buds, their own thoughts, how they view the world through their own lenses, how they feel about circumstances, situations, sadness, pain, their past and the way they were brought up. All of these things are ingredients that have made them who they are today. Not everything they say or do is wrong just because we say it is. We have to learn to accept them just as they are.

Accept your spouse

When my husband and I first got married, his palate was not as diverse as mine. I grew up eating everything but the appliances. My mom is an awesome cook and so was my grandmother. We were expected to eat whatever was put before us with no grumbling or complaining. No matter who cooked it or what it was.