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Renovated Hearts

Today’s guest post for Stories of Redeemed Marriages is from Cassandra Salamone.

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My husband and I have been together since 2005 but married two years and 5.75 months. We share 4 children together–a full house! Right from the start of our relationship, we developed a deep love for one another, but our foundation was cracked. We knew when we said our marriage vows that we were building our house–our marriage– on a foundation that was cracked by selfishness, pride, resentments, and distrust.

My husband wanted to postpone our marriage. I felt a push in my spirit from God to make certain we did not delay, so we proceeded with His building plans (our marriage) in spite of our shoddy relationship. I went into our marriage with one focus: to change my husband into the man I thought he should be. My husband has told me that he went into our marriage with the desire to escape it even though he loved me and wanted to do the right thing by God.

The first year of our marriage was like hell on earth because we didn’t know that in order for a marriage to be a taste of heaven on earth, we would have to invite God into our marriage and follow His expectations, which He outlines in Ephesians 5:22-33. After a year of my husband coming home late at night and discovering his internet indiscretion, I was all cried out, nagged out, depressed out, angered out. I was depleted.

One night, I cried out loud to God: “What am I supposed to do now? I did what you wanted me to do, and he doesn’t love me and doesn’t even want to be a husband.” God heard my cries. He divinely crossed my path with a very special Titus 2 sister who has been married over 33 years. He used her online Bible study of Martha Peace’s book “The Excellent Wife” to break through to me what He expects from me as a wife.

God taught me to worship Him as God, not my husband. He prepared me for the months ahead. My understanding, peace, and joy increased although my husband was hanging out later and for lengthier time-frames  One day, I was confronted online by a young lady when I commented on my husband’s post. She was belligerent and told me that my husband was unfaithful and I should ask him.

He confessed, and I felt the beginnings of my wrath and pain sprout bitter roots, but it was as if God had immediately grabbed the sprouts of anger and severed their heads! He shielded me from feeling that pain and reminded me that it was not about me, but about my husband’s salvation. His adultery revealed the spiritual decay that the devil was using to paralyze and debilitating his spiritual walk.

BUT GOD!!!!!! HALLELUJAH!!!!! He set me apart!!! From the pain and misery and dejection! I forgave him and showed him the.love of Christ. We called the other woman together but could not reach her. I contacted her on my own by telephone and ministered to her about Jesus and the spiritual ramifications of her actions and the life she was leading as an exotic dancer. I forgave her and showed her God’s love for her. I closed the door to that chapter with her assurance that she would never try to  contact us and would seek a church to join.

My husband and I met with a minister at our church and he cried, confessed, repented, and prayed aloud before us to God. God restored what the canker-worm had devoured!!! He broke up the fallow soil in our hearts and planted His divine seed–Christ!!! He stripped me of my contentious ways and stripped my husband of his ego. We are both submitting unto Him!!!

My husband prays for me now, prays for our children! He is faithful and interested in my prayer-life more than whether I put on his favorite dress! My husband who used to hate reading is now reading a devotional to me on his own accord! It is all because of God!!!!! It is all because of Him and without Him our marriage would still be broken and sinking.

Now it is level and built upon the Rock! Upon Christ–the Chief Cornerstone of our marriage. God restored my marriage, and He will restore yours too!!! Just seek Him, read His Word, pray, and lean unto Him, not your understanding as you wait and listen for His guidance.

These are the verses God gave me when I was going through my marriage trials when He turned His face to my cries for help.

Isaiah 54:5-10 ” For your Maker is your husband– the LORD Almighty is his name– the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth. 6 The LORD will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit– a wife who married young, only to be rejected,” says your God. 7 “For a brief moment I abandoned you, but with deep compassion I will bring you back. 8 In a surge of anger I hid my face from you for a moment, but with everlasting kindness I will have compassion on you,” says the LORD your Redeemer. 9 “To me this is like the days of Noah, when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth. So now I have sworn not to be angry with you, never to rebuke you again. 10 Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the LORD, who has compassion on you.

May God bless you!

Cassandra Salamone
www.CassandrasMarriageMints.wordpress.com
www.facebook.com/CassandrasMarriageMints

Cassandra’s bio: Daughter of God, wife and mother of 4. CMBA member. FB Page owner of Cassandra’s Marriage Mints and Proverbs31BlossomsTitus2Butterflies  Writer and Artist who Loves the Lord and is on fire for Him and marriage! I want to empower wives to seek their identities in Christ and have hope for their marriages. I want them to know that marriage is hard work, but it is worth it!

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We invite you to leave a comment for Cassandra, visit her website and Facebook pages.

 

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9 comments

    • Hi nikkihasabookshelf, it was only by the grace of God. I tried to make tears but the feelings of rejection weren’t there. God gave me an awareness that what happened went much deeper than him cheating on me. I was a little disturbed, certainly just thinking about my husband being with another woman. God showed me it was never about me why he did what he did. It was the product of his spiritual state. He was lost and looking at me blaming me for the recognition and fulfilment that comes from knowing who one is in Christ. If you like, feel free to visit my ministry page and send me a direct message. God bless!

    • jackandjanet says:

      nikkihasabookshelfnik I hope Cassandra’s story helps you and also know that she gives sound Godly advice as well.

      And if I may also answer your question, because I have been where your at as well. Just know that the hurt, anger, rejection, feelings of low self worth, they are all very real emotions and it is not unusual that you feel this way. But the answer is not in wanting God to shield you from them. It is in allowing God to help you through them and on to His healing. It is not something anyone would wish to experience, but the Lord promises to use this experience and help you grow in your walk with Him and in your capacity to love and forgive others.

      Jack

  1. Jason Diaz says:

    Praise God, that I read some more from this blog today and that for whatever reason I chose to click and read this story of redeemed marriages. The striking similarities between this story and my own are profound. I think what God has been trying to tell me all along that what is going on between my wife and I is not about me at this point anymore. It is about Rachel and her need for salvation which only God can give. When my wife asked for a divorce on Nov 31st, it only took 2 days for me to realize what this all really meant that both Rachel and I need to answer God’s call to draw back to Him. I’ve chosen to do so because of just how very tired I’ve become of being selfish, controlled by anger, letting my hurtful words spew from my mouth to convey my feelings of anger. God is doing a wonderful work in me, I wish I could say the same for my wife. She is ready to divorce me and leave me for the man she’s been having an year long affair with. I realize now that what God want’s me to know and see is that she needs salvation, restoration and healing in her heart. Her heart is as hard as stone at the moment, but I have faith God can soften her heart, and let the Holy spirit convict her. I wan’t so desperatly for my marriage to be reconciled and for Rachel to love me again but more than anything for her to go back to God. Please anybody reading this , please pray for my wife Rachel, for me and for our marriage. For God’s will, and for Rachel’s soul to be rescued from the grip of the evil one.

    • Rosanna says:

      I understand your hurting and pain Jason. How are you now doing? I am now living in a simular situation. My husband left me after 20 years of marriage and is betraying me. His heart has turned so cold that it really scares me. I will never give up praying for him. May he find his way home to God. I pray for all the spouses who are living such painfull times in their lives. Never give up praying. God loves us und your spouse! He will take care of all things in his own time and wisdom. Praise the Lord. God bless you all.

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